Nancy Cole

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#heart #hypem #hypehotel #beautiful production.

#heart #hypem #hypehotel #beautiful production.

Mar 7
Exactly home. #NorthTower #MarinCountyLine #crunchy GoldenGateBridge #nirthday #friends

Exactly home. #NorthTower #MarinCountyLine #crunchy GoldenGateBridge #nirthday #friends

It’s hard to stay mad when there’s so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I’m seeing it all at once, and it’s too much. My heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst. And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain, and I can’t feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life.

- Lester Burnham, American Beauty

Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal. If you give her a smile she’ll give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.

- Erick S. Gray

Patience only takes you so far. Then, at some point, you’ve moved from patience to self-betrayal.

-

~Nancy Cole

I decided to stop betraying myself as it became increasingly obvious I was being betrayed ever more by a man stuck in an endless loop of lamenting a past betrayal against me.#tragic

As patience wore out, I lost myself. Betrayed who I am. Then I found I had it all in my power to regain sanity, and return to #peace.

Dreamy low #fog under bright blue sky & #sunshine! #classic #SF #SouthTower  (at Golden Gate Bridge)

Dreamy low #fog under bright blue sky & #sunshine! #classic #SF #SouthTower (at Golden Gate Bridge)

I’m definitely going to miss this place. #gorgeous #home #sunset

I’m definitely going to miss this place. #gorgeous #home #sunset

Oxygen & Light

That feeling you get when buried alive — kicking, screaming, scratching in panic — and there appeared the latch. Released. #deepbreath #oxygen #light #freedom

Onward & Upward

This post is for efficient communication (so I hope it isn’t too long!). For those who haven’t yet heard, Khris and I have officially separated. After many many months of struggling with that decision, it became clear that the struggle was overtaking our lives, impacting our family negatively, and causing an undue amount of stress. It’s time for peace.

We have four wonderful kids and we love them tons. They came together from past marriages 11 years ago — at ages 1, 2, 3, and 5 — putting up with our magnetic need to be together — not by their (toddler) choice. And so they bravely, over time, made each other family. It is my hope that they will always be so. And it is my hope that I, and my two children, will be considered close, and my home a place of refuge, to the Loux boys, even after they have become men. I will forever consider them my “bonus” sons, and they always have a place with me and my children.

To our amazing friends and family: please know that an inordinate amount of energy — probably too much effort and energy — was spent attempting to thwart this decision and land on a different outcome. I can say that neither Khris nor I would have ever believed this outcome possible even just a couple of years ago. It was almost impossible to come to given our soul connection, and in the making of the decision, have pushed even our friendship to unthinkable limits. We are still attempting to get our heads around all of this.

And you all have lives that you are living. I write openly because I’ve been incredibly overwhelmed by the support and love each of us has received; and recognize that we are living in somewhat of a drama bubble at the moment (and not necessarily the noisy kind). Things are heavier on the inside, of course. There are many many people I want to connect with about all of this but have not had the chance to yet, am sometimes just sort of stuck, and the focus on *me* feels uncomfortable and egocentric at times with all of the other struggles in the world. There are some I’ve leaned on inordinately. Khris and I are both blessed by all of you. We love each other deeply. And I personally thank you for being there, and for the reminder to push forward with the things that matter the most.

So, not in the spirit of cavalier, but in appreciation for all that I have to celebrate, I echo the words of a very old friend who, upon hearing this news in a one sentence version replied: “well…. onward and upward”. And that was all. Okay, he might have been a bit cavalier. But it’s resonated over the weeks and helped me look to the future.

So I look forward to continuing friendships in any and all instances that they manifest. So many of you mean the world to me, inside or outside of being in a relationship. Thank you for you. Thank you for my family and friends. With love. ~N

Clouds overhead but the light shimmering on the horizon is stunning. Into the Great Wide Open. #hope #promise #poetry (at Half Moon Bay State Beach (Francis Beach))

Clouds overhead but the light shimmering on the horizon is stunning. Into the Great Wide Open. #hope #promise #poetry (at Half Moon Bay State Beach (Francis Beach))

Walking on water. #stillness #peace

Walking on water. #stillness #peace

Stress and the Weight of Water

A friend emailed me this story and it could not have been more perfectly timed:

A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience with a raised glass of water. Everyone knew she was going to ask the ultimate question, ‘half empty or half full?’… She fooled them all …. “How heavy is this glass of water?” she inquired with a smile. Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz.

She replied , “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm.

If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “and that’s the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden - holding stress longer and better each time practiced."

If one puts the burdens down regularly, letting go would be relatively easy. If the glass has been gripped for a very long time, letting go will probably cause some pain before the relief. And if one squeezes too tightly, the glass will break and likely cause injury.

It’s all in the nuances of knowing one’s limits and timing.

Simon Terry: Change begins when you start

simonterry:

Today I saw a conversation on twitter between two people who inspire me with their passion and ability to make change, Maria Ogneva and Susan Scrupski. I also saw a moment in that conversation that represented an insight into change leadership I see again and again. I paraphrased that moment…

All systems go, the sun hasn’t died
Deep in my bones, straight from inside

I’m waking up, I feel it in my bones
Enough to make my systems blow

This is it. The Apocalypse. Whoa.

- Imagine Dragons, “Radioactive”

Ethereal. You know you want some (I do!). #AllensBoots #Austin #sky #SoCo

Ethereal. You know you want some (I do!). #AllensBoots #Austin #sky #SoCo